Stories

Exchanges vast of stories
Funny ones, sad moments,
Random happenings, even unimportant details

Eager tongues cannot be stopped
Laughters cannot be hidden

Amidst of the story, all of a sudden,
There’ll be an involvement of bits of you

Unintentionally, your name keeps on popping
Like I get used to it once more

Realizations came last as it always did
Emotions follow, as it always did

My stories… it cannot lie

Why Didn’t I

I WAS always there for you
when no one else was around

I was always ready to listen
when you can’t rant in front of them

I didn’t see it coming

I believed we had it
that night we told each other not to be afraid
of what’s about to come

I listened to your actions
those good mornings and goodnights
I was eager to read everyday

I didn’t see it coming

I trusted you and felt safety
our tangled hands
arms wrapped around each other

I loved you without certainty
regardless of what they told
and what you didn’t say

I didn’t see it coming

I was an option
I was there because I chose to be there
You let me be there because she can’t

I didn’t see it coming

I wasn’t for you
You didn’t let me be there
because finally, she can

I didn’t see it coming

That you would walk away in my life
The moment she walks back into yours
And you, of all people, left

I thought we were just waiting for the right time
That I was just waiting for you to say the words
But you were just waiting for her all along

Why didn’t I see it coming?

Paralyzed

I

I WANTED to stop..
I am hurting

I wanted to tell you
Again and again

Even if I already did
And yes several times

Too many times

Stomping my pride
Losing a part of me

But you seem not to hear
You seem not to notice

Yes I want you
I wanted you

And still wanting you

But wanting you
Is like breaking my own heart

Wanting you
Is like hating my own self

Wanting you
Is like torturing my own mind

This needed to end
But I’m paralyzed

A masochist
Addicted to my own pain

A desperate
Drowned in my own emotions

It makes me want to curse myself
It makes me fooler than the foolest

It makes me the dumbest than I ever be
It makes me feel sorry for myself

For loving a person like you

II

COULD I ever unfelt my love for you?
Will I ever be capable of loving another?

Having this fear of history
Twice proven to me

‘Tis powerful enough to repeat itself

Having this fear of people
Repeatedly slapped me

Leaving will always be their purpose

Will I ever forget the way you promised me things
Will I ever forget the way we held hands
Will I ever forget the moments we shared turned into memories

I can forget you
But will I ever forget everything about you?

Could I? Can I?