Hail! Oh Sword of Love

I

YOU’VE MET folks, and will still welcome the mankind,
Then, now, forthcoming;

You’ve been stabbing them, neither getting exhausted of it,
Over, over, and over again.

You’ll leave them bleeding with love,
Bruised with ache,
Vested with solitude;

Frozen grief on their faces,
Remorse within their vacuous eyes;
And death within their soul.

II

You’ve met folks incapable of defending their so-called self,
Competent of wasting their so-called life;

You’ll be stabbing them with your sin-sharpened sword,
Heart pierced with vagueness.

You’ll abandon them like a butt of cigarette smoked by several lips,
A butt of cigarette being engulfed by the vanishing fire,
A but of cigarette stomped by hundreds of shoes;
And they’ll die a little death.

III

Sword of Love what a sovereignty in your possession’s,
Don’t you ever get dull?

Sword of Love all of us will encounter your cold-blooded steel;
And when we do,
Bury us!

Sword of Love you’ll have more than a lifetime,
To witness all the aftermath;
Entirely all! Everything!

Sword of Love stab me once, by your weapon,
With all your force,
With all that’s left;
And never retreat –ever.

Oh Sword of Love —

The Morning The World Fell Apart

I can clearly remember that day.

The sun’s about to greet us. The rooster’s about to wake us up.

But it wasn’t the rays of the sun that blinded my eyes. It wasn’t the crowing that irritated my ears.

It was the sound of someone unsuccessfully trying not to make any sound. Or maybe she was successful. Maybe it wasn’t her.

Because it was still dark for someone to be up that early, I was curious. So I asked what she’s up to.

She stared at me. Weighing how she should respond. Then she told me.

I wish I didn’t wake up. I wish I didn’t hear. I wish I didn’t ask.

I couldn’t believe her words. I don’t want to. I hope she was lying. I hope she was wrong. I hope I was still asleep. I hope it was all a bad dream. Just like the dream I had before waking up.

I couldn’t imagine what I heard. Could it possibly be a lie?

I woke up.. maybe it wasn’t her. Maybe it was because of you. Maybe that was your way. Maybe that was your last chance. Maybe it was your last touch.

I can clearly remember that early morning, Inay. It was so vivid that everytime I see darkness, I remember that scene. I remember the conversation that dawn. It was so vivid that everytime I see darkness, I started to hate it.

I can clealry remember that morning, Inay. The morning you started to live the life that people talk about being afraid of. The morning you finally took the road that has been for you. 

I undoubtedly and clearly remember that morning.. the morning I lost you Inay.

My world fell apart. I didn’t know it was possible, but it did fall.

I was a kid then, so clueless on how to handle that kind of loss. No knowledge on how to deal with the pain of losing you Inay, the most important person in my life. My heart literally hurts so much. I was broken.

Grieving as a kid was difficult. I felt all kinds of pain I couldn’t explain then. Different kinds. The pain of losing you is different from the pain of denial. The pain of knowing every single day will pass by without you. The pain of actually experiencing each and every day. The pain of losing the one person I value the most. The pain of having to move forward. The pain of accepting the fact that life goes on and that it must, without you. Without you. Isn’t the world so harsh?

All my life you were there. How could I know that losing you is possible. I wasn’t ready. I still need you. I need you to guide me. I need your care. Most of all, I need your love Inay.

Today marked 12 years after that morning. I’ve been living more than half of my life without you. It pains me knowing I have lived without you. The worst part is that the pain is always there. Sometimes it hides but it never goes away. Sometimes it even demands so much that I still cry.

I will always mourn your loss, Inay. Be it 12 more years from now.

Life’s a Playlist

The song titles used were ALL from soundtracks of YouMeHer series


Life’s a Playlist
Life’s a Patch of Music

Something’s happening to me.
I wanna be alone,
Go rattle and roar,
To the house on the moon,
The place from where I fell.
Von boyage, round and round
Through the corner of space

Something’s happening to me.
I think you got it, Dimitrius.
I was the cold fire in rain.
I blow the bass to your Bodhi song.
I am the waves that rolled you under.
Von boyage, round and round
Through the road of palm trees

Something’s happening to me.
I know how to love,
But love is trippy,
Where it ends, where it begins,
Your future was my fantasy.
Von boyage, round and round
The world is turning and turning.

Something’s happening to me.
A brand new alpenglow.
Wild eyes everywhere,
They see nothing but trouble,
I see nothing but a dream.
Von boyage, round and round
Chasing the gasoline rainbow

Something’s happening to me.
Fallin’ with the great American shakedown.
Anytime now, the propeller’s going to break down.
Sorry now, it’s almost done,
I can’t go back now, there is a light.
Von boyage, round and round
Goodnight, goodbye now.

List of Songs used:
*Something’s Happening To Me – Arum Rae
*I Wanna Be Alone – La Luz
*Go – Starry Saints
*Rattle and Roar – Kodiak Deathbeds
*House on The Moon – Tootawl
*Place From Where I Fell – Elenowen
*Von Boyage – Oil Bloom


*Round and Round – Arkells
*Corner – Allie Moss
*I Think You Got It – The Lower 48
*Dimitrius – Sarah Gillespie
*Cold Fire in Rain – Ayer
*Blow The Bass – Lowell
*Bodhi Song – Rose Windows
*Waves That Rolled You Under – Young Summer
*Roads – Sonder Saloon


*Palm Trees – Lowell
*I Know How To Love – Kara Hesse
*Love is Trippy – Amy Kuney
*Where It Ends, Where It Begins – Sacco
*Future – Eastern Block
*Fantasy – Anya Marina
*World Is Turning – Karlie Bruce
*Brand New – Emelie Mover
*Alpenglow – S. Carey


*Wild Eyes – Matthew Mayfield
*Nothing But Trouble – Drew Holcomb & The Neighbors
*Nothing But a Dream – Jess Delgado
*Gasoline Rainbow – Amy Kuney
*Fallin’ – Cary Brothers
*The Great American Shakedown – Oil Bloom


*Anytime – The Lower Caves
*Propeller – Young Summer
*Sorry Now – Allie Moss
*Almost Done – Hooded Fang
*I Can’t Go Back Now – Matthew Perryman Jones
*There Is A Light – Rose Windows
*Goodnight Goodbye – The High Violets